First of all I want to apologize, my plan was not to be absent from the blog all week! In the mean time the idea for this post on changing perspective has been jumping out at me.
I have been feeling unsure of what to post about this week. So I have been doing lots of research on blogging, from SEO to how long the posts should be. I guess I would call it regrouping! SEO = Search engine optimization, and apparently it’s a big deal.
I digress, so why have I been feeling unsure….I think because I have been applying to a job, yes thats right a job, only one job, but it has been consuming all of my time. This one job has been filling up my brain, so I have been updating my resume and wrangling up references. But this has left me feeling a little guilty about the blog, like I’m cheating on it! If you want to hear about the job let me know!
I was at an Epicure cooking class and I saw a friend that I hadn’t seen in a while, she mentioned that she wants to do what I’m doing and quit her job! When I think about others I think well of course they could easily do what I am doing. This made me think back to when I first considered quitting my job and it made me realize just how much my thinking and perspective has changed. Which inspired me to write this post!
How does your perspective have to change for you to quit your job?
Prioritize what is important to you
What are you looking for out of life? How important is money to you, is your honking SUV your status symbol, do you absolutely love your cottage at the beach? Seriously, think long and hard about it, is money a tool that you use to make your life more convenient or is it something that you need to allow you to sleep at night? Are you in debt up to your eyeballs…if that is the case i hate to break it to you, the best thing would be to deal with the debt first.
To be honest with you I used money both ways I used it to make life more convenient all of the time. Why not, I was making a pretty penny, and i wanted to use my free time to be free, not shovel the driveway, build fences, or weed my flower beds.
I needed money to sleep at night, or I thought I did. When I actually crunched the numbers I realized how much money I could actually get by on, I found that I needed a lot less money to be able to sleep. Which leads us into looking at your budget.
Look at your budget realistically
Be honest here, it’s okay if you have never done it. But DO IT NOW, you really can’t assess you life financially unless you know how much money is coming in and how much is going out. Once you have your budget figured out then you can look at what can change. For me the magic monthly number is around $2300 per month. This affords me:
- a vehicle, including insurance, maintenance, gas and government licensing fees
- a roof over my head (all things included ie. internet, phone, heat, hydro, water)
- two dogs to take care of
- entertainment budget
Huge warning sign ahead, no budget for savings! This is what i consider to be my “I can sleep at night” amount of money. Ideally I need to make at least $500 per month extra for savings. Savings for things like emergencies, maintenance and retirement. But all in all this is what I consider to be a fairly comfortable budget aside from the fact that vacations are not accounted for. These will have to be special budget items.
Listen to your instincts
The mantra at my old job was “it’s all pensionable time”. It’s true pensions are amazing to have and I’m pretty sure they are are going the way of the dodo bird (a saying which I’m sure is dating me, and is possibly not relevant any more :-o). What this saying meant to me was that in order to retire and be free, I had to live this unauthentic life, that, quite frankly, had started to really piss me off. This made me sad, angry and depressed
In 2014 both my personal trainer and therapist were asking me if I had considered quitting my job. It seemed like a crazy impossible dream. The answer was no! Things were supposed to be temporary at work, just needed to push through and get task ABC done. First real lesson learned about the capitalistic structure, the more work you can get done, the more work you will have to do, and this seems to be relative.
In the years that followed nothing got better, I started to feel like i was doing the doggy paddle in the middle of the ocean. Eventually I started to sink, it was like a switch had flipped, my body turned on survival mode. It got really bad, so when I say listen to your instincts, I am no expert! My instincts were slapping me in the face constantly. The more I listened the stronger they got, and the more clear everything became.
Instincts may just be seeing what you don’t want to
My doctor, his nurse, my new therapist, everyone was telling me. I’m stubborn though and I wanted to perservere. When I really paid attention my body was telling me too, I couldn’t sleep, I had gained weight, I couldn’t breathe, I cried all of time, nausea and headaches were the norm.
Eventually it became too much and I knew I had to get out. The job was killing me, I didn’t choose it this way, it just was. I did my very best to hang in there. My body and brain took over with instincts, these seemed to be to eat, cry and most importantly to protect myself.
Have a little faith
Since I haven’t been working I feel much more relaxed, I have all the time in the world, and it feels amazing! I actually enjoy shovelling the driveway, fixing up the house, and working on DIY projects. I can focus on these things fully because I have no time contstraints. This in turn allows me to save money!
I now have the time to shop around for bargains and build things for myself. My mind used to lead me to buying something i wanted, now it leads to how can I make this thing for myself?
I’m even applying to a job, I might not get it, and I might not want it either! The key is that my mind is now much more open to the universe. It might sound “airy fairy” but some things in life are bigger than what I can comprehend. I keep an eye out on the job market just to see what’s out there. This always makes me feel better. There are a ton of jobs out there right now, even in my area of Grey and Bruce Counties. I could easily get a job that would get me close to my monthly budget.
This is a type of short term, make me feel better thinking. This seems to free my brain up to more exciting things, like starting a retreat centre, blogging and/or being some type of entreprener. Not to mention the idea of passive income. Thanks to Pinterest, for making it so easy to find uselful articles!
Faith in Yourself
So have some faith that everything will be okay, the world will not fall apart, you will still be safe and sound! If you are reading this, you have fighter in you! Fighters are survivors! You are not going to let your life go to shit. We are capable of so much more than we give ourselves credit for.
How Has My Thinking Changed?
I went from “OMG I have to live like this for another 15-20 years” to “hey life is long, surely I can make a living doing something that I am passionate about”. I spent a lot of time on Pinterest searching for ways to make money, side hustles, blogging. It all came down to money, once I changed my mind about money, it seemed easier from there. This took me over 2 years! The money was my cushion, I’ve built up a little cushion and now I can sit on it for a while and figure out the next steps are going to be.
I have learned many things about myself during this journey, having lots of money was not more important than my health. Doing something that I didn’t feel was authentic was also very important. My journey has led me down a path were I now feel like I will always be in control of my destiny.
Does this mean I will close myself off to the world, NO! It means I will be more careful with who I trust and with what I trust them with. I feel this has allowed me to be more open minded with people because I am not judging them by their faults. I am expecting them to have faults, it is how they handle those faults that matter.
If you are considering quitting your job please don’t give up on your dream! If I can do it, anyone can, and that is just the sad ass truth. Don’t tell me you can’t because it’s all lies! The world is huge and life is long, don’t wait to live it!